I’ve missed posting regularly. Over the past few weeks and before that several other weeks, I addressed family matters instead of posting and other writing.
The good news is that Grandmother moved safely into a skill nursing room and has accepted Hospice services. Hospice provides remarkable support for her, for the skilled nursing staff, and for our extended family. Grandmother is our sixth extended family member receiving these services in the past few years. Hospice nurses and volunteers, even the new ones, soon seem like skilled, loving family members.
Grandmother is a former grammar school music teacher plus homemaker, etc.
And, she is the first of four generations of women in our family to work with computers! She started over twenty years ago. She leaves a legacy of eleven women in four generations of one family using computers for business and pleasure. We feel so privileged.
It’s wonderful when Grandmother’s mind allows her to talk, joke, or sing with us, even for a few minutes every once in awhile. For that matter, any response draws a smile from each of us. Joan and I have driven over 5,000 miles back and forth this past month to enjoy those moments with her and to hold her hand during other times.
On one visit, Lora and Loren used a Tablet PC to show Grandmother family pictures. They adjusted sizes and brightness of each picture, so Grandmother could see different parts that may have been of interest. We don’t know what she saw or understood, but we know she attended to the images.
The human mind is such a fascinating unit. I’m grateful to all those who offer scientific studies to explain how it works. Yet, much about it I do not understand.
Sometimes Grandmother lives for a few moments at a time in our day and place. Mostly, we try to figure out what context seems real to her, so we may join her even if only briefly and by proxy.
I wonder where her life-learned wisdom is buried when it emerges seemingly from nowhere.
Joan commented that someone put stars on a bracelet on her wrist. Grandmother asked if she would have stars in her crown? Together the two of them sang the old hymn about earning stars in our crowns. Then, Grandmother asked me to sing with them. I said, “I don’t sing.” “Yes you do,” she responded quickly as though she remembered that I used to sing often, including with a touring quartet.
If you don’t know already, let me tell you it’s hard to sing while trying not to cry from pleasure of talking and singing maybe for the last time with a loved one. Joan and I know how to kick into neutral and perform to the back row under such situations, but neither of us wanted to do so this time and miss any of the pleasures with Grandmother.
We all got a big kick out of Grandmother’s comment to Joan about staff talking in the activity center one day. In response to a question I don’t remember that Joan asked, Grandmother said, “They do go on and on, don’t they!” She indicated she was ready to leave, so they did.
And so will I leave for now with a thank you for accepting gaps in my postings. I look forward to returning to a regular posting schedule, but will continue to give priority to Grandmother and related family matters as long as her health permits.
Ya’ll come back, ya’ hear!